Gap

It was touch and go Friday lunchtime, no sooner had the snow cleared when the youngest smasher took a tumble down the stairs, "...‘ee was ‘elping me wiv moi h’inqueries..."
bless him and his front tooth came clean out! Blood everywhere, dentist called, who, basically, said there was nothing he could do.
All the drama was making me think twice about going to see me mate in Northampton, but the smasher looked me in the eyes, holding his blooded mouth with his paw, nodded at me, and I could almost swear he was saying..“go on dad, go on the piss, don’t worry about me”…(cough) so I did.
The evening wasn’t anything special, me mate was feeling rough with a cold, it was freezing out, so the town was half empty and to top it off, we ended up in Chicago’s.
My god, it was like a very bad 1980’s dream gone extra terrible on my erse, after eating lots of cheese, minutes before hitting the sack. The ratio men to “women” was something approaching 4-1, the music was grim, the floors sticky and booze pricey. After 4 hours I’d had enough and said to me mate, let’s go get a burger. A reality check is what I wanted, and it was what I got I tell ya! Be happy with your wife, it could be much much worse. Much worse. (shudder)